I wish I could have titled this post 'The Great Ant Expulsion' - however, that is not the case. This morning, I went about my watering routine as usual, revitalizing my wilting porch plants before the heat of the day set in. All was going well - the basil was perking up, and even my aloe plant (which I only recently learned how to water correctly) was starting to plump up with gel. But alas, two of my plants remained weak and frail, despite my efforts at quenching their thirst. An otherwise healthy, Black Pearl pepper plant and a nearby pot of patchouli slumped before me like weeping willows. My eyes drifted, inspecting the premises. And then I saw the culprit.
ANTS.
I'd already made about 3 trips to the faucet by the time I made my discovery - in which time, I had likely trampled scores of busy black ants and their larvae luggage. I cringed. A steady stream (nay, a raging river of Mississippian proportions) of these incessant insects was marching with full force from my Oregano plant to my Patchouli plant, a mere four feet away. What were they doing? I wondered silently as they scaled the clay pot en mass, their unborn baggage in tow.
Then I saw the second wave, this time coming in from behind. These must be the gypsy ants, I mused, sneaking their way up from below the deck to squat in my pepper plant. And while their caravan was less dense, it was certainly no less populated. The bastards, I thought.
At this point, I wasn't exactly sure what their game plan was. They were all running around the outside of the pots in a frenzy, seemingly without rhyme or reason. Apparently, the river rocks under the deck must have lost whatever property value they once had, and my potted plants had become the proverbial 'deluxe apartment in the sky'. Maybe the ants were just movin' on up?
Regardless of the reason, these ants made one fatal mistake in their move; they failed to consider the safety of their neighborhood. And so, throwing my environmental integrity out the window in a wave of helplessness and despair (okay, so maybe I was just a little pissed off. We have SO MANY ANTS) I decided to fight back. Being bad never felt so good. (but don't worry, I still feel bad).
Nonetheless, the ants (at least, those that survived Annageddon) have still managed to move into their new digs. And, poisonous sprays aside, it looks like the only way I'm going to get rid of them is if I dig them out - plants and all.
Sigh. What is a girl to do?
